Recent news stories 8 May 2008 - Talking About Your Cellulite: Hollywood's Newest Trend!
Remember how Paris Hilton called Kim Kardashian's ass "cottage cheese inside a big trash bag" and then was all like, "Haha, that was so totally a joke. I love Kim. She's hot. I'd love to bury my face in that cheese and slurp it up" or something to that effect? And then Kim was like, "We're cool. I'm not mad. LYLAS, BFF 4-EVA." What she was really thinking was, "I hope a rat crawls...
(full story) | 16 Apr 2008 - Paris No Fan of Kardashian's Can
Most humans are transformed into quivering, genuflecting, humble peons in the presence of Kim Kardashian's twin gluteal globules. Like Montezuma himself, her mammoth ass reigns over Hollywood. But there is one person who doesn't wish to tame and possess its soft, domed wonder: one Miss Paris Hilton. On Monday, Paris made a guest appearance on a Las Vegas radio show, and said, I would not want [Kims butt] - its gross! It reminds me of...
(full story) | 27 Mar 2008 - Be Paris Hilton's BFF. We're Sure It Won't Be As Bad As It Sounds.
Paris Hilton has had pretty bad luck with friends. Nicole Richie deserted her in an effort to be normal. She seemed to trigger Britney Spears's crazy gene, with unbelievable consequences. And Kim Kardashian's ass got sick of battling with Paris's feet for the title of most comically large appendage and bailed. So now Paris is on a hunt for new meat that she can mold into a slightly less attention-worthy version of herself. And...
(full story) | 6 Mar 2008 - Good Gracious, Kardass Is Bodacious
In the wild, zebras are social creatures that travel in packs called harems. Frequently preying on hyenas, lions, and other wild predators, they are skittish animals with highly developed senses. Unlike Kim Kardashian's zebra-printed ass, actual zebras probably haven't accepted a drenching in Brandy's brother's urine....
(full story) | 9 Nov 2007 - Kim Kardashian Superstar Goes All The Empire Strikes Back On Us
This morning we found out that Kim Kardashian Superstar Part 2 was going to be released by Vivid and our victorious huzzahs filled the air. "Finally!" we thought. "The elusive...
(full story) | 28 Sep 2007 - 32-Inch Rise
Unlike 90% of the population, we at CelebNewsWire are fans of high-waisted jeans. But like 100% of the population, we are not fans of high-waisted jeans on Kim Kardashian. On...
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